Major Decisions, Privacy, and Adult Children

 Karson has always been wise beyond her years.  That's such a blessing as her mom.  It can also be a tricky thing when tough decisions have to be made.  Out of respect and privacy for her, I didn't want to post on social media but with her blessing I wanted to blog about her experience in the hope that it might be helpful for someone else, someone in her situation, someone struggling with this decision.  

On our way to the hospital (yes hospital) Monday morning, we talked a lot about what was about to happen, as we have over the course of the last two months.  She told me that she was glad that the pain she was feeling was not her fault.  There was nothing she could've done differently to avoid what happened to her.  

What happened to her?  Nothing super dramatic but something unavoidable.  During her senior year of high school, specifically during sports, she started having some pain in her hip - the left hip especially.  Sports and lingering injuries are something every athlete has.  Karson was a multisport athlete through high school.  Mild injuries weren't unusual.  The trainer at South thought maybe the aggravated hip was stretching related.  The pain was fairly rough through basketball season but wasn't as severe during track probably because she was a sprinter.   She decided the summer after her senior year to see a local orthopedic.  She and the doctor both felt like maybe she had bursitis.  He told her physical therapy would help and gave her a cortisol injection in the left hip.  The pain continued into college.  She joined a sorority and got involved in intramural sports.  Around October her flag football team made it to the Championship game.  She did a quick lateral move to get around a girl and felt a pop and an indention also appeared pretty prominently in left hip socket.  When she came home over Christmas break, she was in pain and decided to work with a local PT and try some therapy sessions.  Her therapist reached out to me and encouraged me to go back to her Ortho since she'd had this additional injury.  Because Bowling Green had been hit with the tornados, most of the Orthos were covered up; however, she was able to get in to see a PA who checked her out and told her to continue to rehab the hip and suggested some other PT therapies.  She went back to school for the spring semester and the pain continued.  It was significant one night when she had to walk from Louisville's waterfront back to her dorm (around 4 miles).

When she came home for summer break, we decided to get another opinion and my PT highly recommended Elite Sports Medicine in Nashville.  We set the appointment in May hoping to get some answers when Dr. Brian Dierckman enters our lives.  This guy knows his stuff and is a hip specialist.  In fact, Karson's issues were the primary reason he went in orthopedics.  He actually suffers from the same thing but because he didn't receive the right treatment now faces double hip replacement. Essentially what we found out was that hip specialists look for a couple of different things - one of them being the coverage of the hip socket (the roof hovering the ball for those of us who are less educated).  Her left socket was measuring 19 degrees - low end normal is 25. A ball in a socket should be perfectly level and fully covering the ball.  Because she had a shallow socket, hers was significantly displaced.  Her roof wasn't level.  If your ball isn't fully covered, it's going to be unstable which is why she was in pain and feeling all the instability in her hip.  Sadly the other hip is 20 degrees.  After an MRI (two weeks later) showed she had a labral tear, that would be an easy fix.  By itself, the doctor can go through poke holes, scope and fix it by reshaping the femur.  However, because of K’s hip dysplasia, it's a BIGGER problem which involves cutting the pelvis in four places, all around the socket and move it over the ball and screw it back together which is a prolonged hospital stay, recovery is 6 months.  The failure rate would be really high if she simply repaired the labrum alone because of the soft tissue and dysplasia.  (A younger) Dr. Dierckman had both of his hips scoped at the same time when he got his repaired and within a year, he was bone on bone - destroyed.  His bad dysplasia was not recognized and treated appropriately.  Scoping as a treatment plan for hips is very risky.    To fix her hip the way he suggested is/was a big deal with a high success rate but a very long recovery.  However, you have a good hip afterwards.

The answers we got as a result of that visit were not the ones we wanted to hear but necessary for a long term quality of life for her with (hopefully) no hip replacement.  We decided to proceed with surgery.  Dr. Dierckman wanted to push her surgery out into September, but when we told him Karson was planning to go back to school at UL this fall and begin her nursing clinicals in Spring 2023, he found a spot for her in July. 

She and I arrived on Monday (the 11th) at Acension Saint Thomas - Midtown in Nashville ready to tackle this GIANT obstacle that has prevented her from enjoying being a young, 19 year old college student.  Shannon had let us borrow her van which is a nice, comfortable ride and the perfect vehicle for coming home.  We got checked in and set up in her room.  Because she's an adult, I wasn't able to be with her in the pre-op room or post-op room.  We knew the day was going to be very brutal but fortunately, I got periodic phone calls throughout the procedure to know where they were at in the process.  I went and got some groceries, hauled all of our bags in the room, continued to text and keep everyone posted and watched television to kill time.

 

She got back to the room around 5PM.  They wanted her to eat some liquid foods at some point to make sure she was ready for real food so they could put the order in before the kitchen closed.  She was able to stomach some jello, pudding and Italian ice, even ate some goldfish crackers.  Because her stomach was still waking up, no one wanted her to overdo it.  The dinner was edible at best, but I also ordered an ala carte chicken soup.  She ate the roll but very little of the dinner and none of the soup.  She had a foley in which was very uncomfortable and made her feel like she had to go to the bathroom constantly.  Dr. Dierckman came in and visited with us briefly and showed me what he had done to her.  The nurses continued monitoring her throughout the night, gave her pain meds, and kept her IV going to assist with relief.  Her mouth was super dry, and it seemed like we couldn't keep her hydrated (still feels that way even days later).  

Tuesday:  we both woke up around 5am and breakfast was delivered super early as well.  It was fruit, eggs, a biscuit and sausage links.  She ate most of the biscuit with jelly and a few pieces of fruit and bites of sausage.  I made a Starbucks run and got her a muffin and her favorite treat - a vanilla sweet cream coldbrew.  I don't really recall what steps happened in what order, but the foley was removed at some point in the day.  It also meant that she'd need to get up to use the bathroom.  PT had already come in and helped her move a little.  It made her feel light headed so she didn't make it very far.  A meatloaf and potatoes lunch arrived...blehh.  She didn't eat much of it but a little later, I ordered her an ala carte cheese quesadilla which she really enjoyed. Nurses came in and out and worked with her on the portable potty.  Her stomach was pretty distended, and she's been fairly uncomfortable with needing/wanting to have a bowel movement.  Everyone knows a good BM makes you feel better.  We killed time watching some Netflix series and dinner (turkey and dressing) arrived...bleh again - I believe all she ate were the peaches and the roll, maybe a few bites of vegetables.  A little later, she ordered ala carte chicken tenders and fries.  Everything tasted super dry to her.  Again, she was super dehydrated.  Dr. Dierckman came in and green lighted us for a potential discharge on Wednesday.  We were super pumped about that news.  A little later, her IV was removed which was also nice.

 

Wednesday:  she felt really sick to her stomach and throughout the night.  Again, she's popping pills and her stomach is still waking up and she hasn't eaten much.  The French toast, bacon and fruit breakfast arrived and I ordered her an ala carte oatmeal.  She ate very little before it all came back up.  Throwing up did offer some relief thankfully, and she immediately felt better.  The nurse wanted to restart her IV and get some fluids in her.  I honestly thought this was going to happen after she puked, but it didn't. At some point that morning, the OT's came in and worked with her on showering. The were a little concerned about the IV needle that was still in her arm but taped her up well.  The shower felt great.  Around lunch, I grabbed some Chick Fil A, even though lunch had been delivered.  She was tired and resting at that point.  I don't remember when the nurse came back in and started her IV but ended up having to restick her in the other arm which was super painful.  Again, I wasn't sure why they were doing it to begin with since so much time had passed.  She and I had taken it upon ourselves by this day to do bathroom use without assistance.  I figured we needed to learn since we'd be leaving soon.  After lunch the PT came and tortured showed her how to do some very specific things like steps and cars.  He was great, but it was painful.  We were literally counting the minutes to when we could leave, and this PT session gave us the closure we needed.  Her medicines had already been called into CVS pharmacy in BG.  Matt's mom was sweet enough to go collect those for us.

The nurse came in, checked us out, and we bounced as fast as we could. Eh hem, I bounced, and she took the wheelchair route.  I loaded the van up, and we hoisted her in.  When we hit the Kentucky state line, I called my dad.  I have failed to mention that Matt was totally out of pocket this week due to school leadership meeting out of town that had already been pre-scheduled months earlier.  I needed my dad at our house to help get her inside.  Even in the afterlife my sweet Poppy has been a blessing.  We have all of his medical equipment for her to use at home - walker, bath chair, potty seat, even wheelchairs if we need them.  Food was abundant and family and friends have stopped by to load her/us up with supplies.  WHAT...A...BLESSING.  Karson is private person and didn't want things posted on social media and didn't want to receive visitors in the hospital.  I am simply documenting all of this in my blog as way of remembering her journey. 

Her post-op is scheduled for next Tuesday, and our lovely physical therapist Bethany already has her on the books for the last week of this month.  We are literally taking things one day at a time right now.  Each day she is getting stronger and stronger.  

All three kids cuddled up on the couch watching The Haunting Hour and laughing together.  Makes my mama heart happy.

She has temporarily moved into our downstairs bedroom for the time being.  It's much simpler for her to be on the main floor of our house for the next few weeks.  We both slept in late this morning.  She ate a good breakfast and got a shower.  Thank you all for the texts, calls, foods and prayers for our girl!  The love is felt so much!!!  

Fro Yo Shou...

Translated = old people problems.  I am currently doing physical therapy for a frozen shoulder (which I can Fro Yo Shou).  What is that you ask?  No idea except more old people problems in your 40's.  My current ailments include a frozen shoulder, a juicy lip sore from where I crunched down on my lip eating, a weird rash that broke out on my neck after Isaac's Senior picture session at Graham's and a broken blood vessel in the arch of my foot which I believe was caused by the pedicurist at Nails Express who tortured me last week (my toe nails look good though - score).  There is a funny bit circulating on social media by Jim Gaffigan which sums up how you feel in your 40's.  It hurts to hurt - lol.  

     Matt hurt himself not too long ago and has been nursing a torn bicep from wake surfing behind his brother's boat.  It's been a summer y'all!  

Rewinding back a few weeks, Matt and I celebrated 23 years together.  Paul and Shannon had a fun trip to Woodford Reserve booked the weekend of our anniversary.  Although I am not a lover of bourbon (more of a sweet sugary wine gal), I enjoyed learning about the process and doing tastings.  I was also able to get one of my Skyctc besties a gift from there.  Our Chef Tammy Inscoe is one of those people that simply goes above and beyond for not only her students but people in general.  To know her is to love her.  She made some bourbon balls to honor my grandfather who passed last month.  She ONLY uses Woodford for bourbon balls, so I picked her up a special treat at their headquarters.

Don't ask me to recite what was told to us on the tour.  I have little retention these days - probably due to wine intake.  However, we enjoyed learning about the process and walking around the grounds.

 

Shannon had decided to book dinner reservations at the Kentucky Castle.  None of us had been there before, and it's the first thing you notice when you arrive in Lexington.  It's a big, glamorous castle...eh hem...from a distance.  It's not much on site.  In fact, Shannon had specifically asked them if they had a wedding scheduled for the Saturday we went.  They told her no, and upon our arrival, SURPRISE, a wedding prep was everywhere.  We sort of felt like intruders on the grounds with the wedding party everywhere.  The castle itself was pretty run down in my opinion.  It's hard to explain but simply enjoying it from a distance is about all anyone needs - don't waste your time.  We collectively decided that we should cancel our dinner reservations.  Again, it was wedding central, and we weren't convinced we could get decent service, especially for the price the meal was going to cost.  A couple of calls were made....and we landed at Malone's.  10/10 y'all!!!  Matt and I had never eaten there and cannot wait to go back.  It was delicious!!!

 

 

 

We lounged around the house and didn't really do anything special on our actual anniversary which we both liked.  

The remaining weeks of June were spent trying to get Isaac prepared for his big summer trip to Germany.  Europe is six hours ahead of us which is sort of weird to think about him already being in "tomorrow" each day.  

He left last Saturday and has been exploring Berlin and Frieberg this week and will end his trip in Switzerland before returning home on Tuesday.  We've gotten some pictures from Isaac here and there...but the group leaders are actively posting on Instagram which is nice.  I think they are also trying to figure out a way to share them after the trip.

Summer = golf for Miles.  Things are a little different for him this year as he's been working out a lot.  He's bigger, got new clubs and simply adjusting everything makes an already challenging sport a little more challenging.  He's been getting lessons and practicing.  He's played in a few tournaments and has a few more before the high school season starts.

Enjoying some water fun with friends on these blistering summer days.

We celebrated Father's Day at Andrew's house.  They invited us over for a nice brunch to celebrate our favorite men.

NYC is Cursed

 Not really...but NYC is attached to some really wonderful memories but sad ones as well.  I recently won an award of excellence from Skyctc as a supporting staff member.  As a result of the award, I was able to travel to NYC with a group of colleagues/friends to attend the AACC Conference Saturday, April 30 through Tuesday, May 3.  

I've been fortunate to travel New York twice in the last few years that it's starting to feel a bit familiar.  Matt and I celebrated our 20th there back in 2019 and had a blast.  Four years earlier,  I went with my sister to celebrate her 40th birthday.  Days before we left. Matt's dear granny, Lucy Bradford, passed away.  

Many of you close to our family know that my grandfather has been in bad shape for a while.  His mental health was sharp, but his physical health has been in decline for a LONG time.  Every birthday, every Christmas, he would say that same thing..."I didn't get my wish this year."  We all knew what he meant - bless his heart.  Sadly and happily, he left us on Sunday, May 1.  My mom didn't want to tell me and spoil my trip but wanted me to know.  I called her.  We cried.  Happy tears.  My sadness was not being able to be at home with her and my Uncle Mike.  Plans are in place to have a small, intimate service in Louisville later this month.  His obituary link.

Despite everything, my time was still enjoyable in NYC.  The conference was great.  The speakers were incredible.  My colleagues were super fun to be with and great memories were made.

Our small group arrived late in the day on Saturday.  After checking into the Hilton Midtown, we dropped our bags off and went to check in to the conference.  None of us changed.  I think we were all thinking we were "checking in" to get all our credentials and do our health scans.  I was in jeans, nothing fancy - just the comfy clothes I wore on the plane.  Everyone around us was dressed for the conference - business attire, skirts, coats, dress shoes, not us!  We were ushered into the Opening Lecture which was great.  I took TWO things from it.  One, this conference was going to have some incredible speakers.  Two, I was WAY under dressed.  So much for first impressions, right?!?!?

Our Provost Dr. J made us dinner reservations at the Brooklyn Diner.  Food + NYC = sign me up!  After dinner, we made our way over to Times Square.  Is there anything more fancy and Hollywood-like than Times Square at night?  The city was hopping.  We made a big loop and headed back to the hotel.  It was a long travel day, and Sunday was super full.

I was charged with finding a place for us to eat breakfast on Sunday, so naturally I picked the best breakfast place that I knew of in NYC - Junior's.  I've eaten there the two other times and fortunately it was fairly close to our hotel.

After our sessions on Sunday, we took a nice stroll through Central Park before heading over to Tavern on the Green for dinner.  It was a FEAST y'all.  We were treated like royalty dining on delicious appetizers, meals and desserts.  Skyctc totally spoiled us!

 

Monday was somber.  Our plan that morning was to attend the 9/11 Memorial.  It's definitely a must if you've never been to NYC; however, it was my third time.  It was especially hard/emotional to go through after my grandfather's passing. 

After the museum, I convinced our hungry group that NYC's BEST pizza was a few blocks away which was nice and quick because it had begun drizzling.  If you've never eaten at Joe's Pizza, it's a must - a NYC staple and super cheap too (which is rare in New York).

The gala was that night.  Drop...Dead...Gorgeous table settings and ballroom.  We wined and dined and wrapped up all the events of the week/weekend.  

Because our hotel was fairly close to Rockefeller Plaza, I figured that would be a nice place to visit on our last day.  We'd planned to leave the hotel around 1PM to head to the airport.

  

Some of the shops didn't open until 10AM so we headed over to Toasties for breakfast and visited Saint Patrick's Cathedral.  On the way there we passed by (and were in AWE of) Casa Batllo: Living Architecture piece,

Christie’s will present Casa Batlló: Living Architecture, a monumental artwork inspired by Casa Batlló’s facade in Barcelona, Spain. Created by Turkish-American media artist and director Refik Anadol, Casa Batlló: Living Architecture is the first UNESCO World Heritage Site to take the form of a live NFT, with ephemeris created using climate data from the city collected in real-time being projected onto Casa Batlló’s facade.

The monumental and multisensory experience will remain up outside Rockefeller Plaza through May 13, 2022. On May 10, 2022, Casa Batlló: Living Architecture will be auctioned off as part of the 21st Century Evening Sale and will be the only NFT offered during the five day series of Christie’s Spring Marquees Week sales. Ten percent of the proceeds from the sale will be donated to the Associació Aprenem Autisme and Fundació Adana institutions.

  

The breathtaking Saint Patrick's Cathedral which is free to the public and open throughout the week to visitors.  We did a little shopping before heading back to our hotel.  I wanted to snag some gifts from Anthropologie for Mother's Day.  Love that store and could spend hours in there for some reason!

Our flight home was smooth and painless.  We got back to BG around 7, and I was excited to see my sweet family.

Our girl is home for the summer.  Not sure if I've mentioned it or not, but we are thrilled having her back.  However, she's always on the move.  She had planned to go back to Louisville this weekend for Derby and then to Myrtle Beach for a few days.  She's been painting a cooler for her boyfriend Adam for the trip.  Who knew this was a thing?  I guess because I never did Greek life, I wasn't aware.  She's been working on her cooler for two weeks.  I thought she did a pretty great job.  

 

 

A few other noteworthy events worth mentioning...Isaac went to SWHS Junior Prom a few weeks ago.  Having a son go to prom is nothing like having a daughter.  I knew I would have pictures, know all the details, be involved in all the fun of hair, makeup, etc.  My son, not so much.  However, I did decide to tackle flowers with the help of my bestie Larie.  Flowers are expensive y'all!  Honestly, I'm not sure flower arrangements get any prettier than those at Kroger.  I knew I could find a gorgeous bouquet, which I did, with hot pink as the requested color.  I'd purchased some black satin ribbon and corsage pins and viola....

 

Magic Happened!

 

I got a few pictures before he left and waited for the professional ones by the talented Tori Thompson.  I thought he and his date were stunning.

SWHS had an awards day and this year was extra special to me.  Our older two have gotten lots of awards and recognition through the years, but I'm pretty sure neither of them have won a class specific award.  Miles was recognized this year by his English 1 teacher Ms. Casey Stephens. 

We are super proud of how hard he has worked with was evident on his Pre-ACT where he scored a 28 in English/Reading.  School has never been easy for Miles although he's always done well.  I think much of your education experience is having a teacher that truly believes in you and pushes you the right way.  Ms. Stephens has been wonderful and knows how special and smart Miles is.  We truly appreciate her!

  

   

Derby and Mother's Day all lumped into one weekend.  It was a chilly, fun weekend eating and enjoying life.  Our Chef at Skyctc whipped me up some tasty bourbon balls for race on Saturday.  We also brought along our Derby glasses that Doug (Matt's granddad who passed away earlier this year) had collected.  It was fun unwrapping them all and seeing all the designs/winners/years, etc.

My three moms!